UPDATE: Hanging Out With Friends

I can't believe I did not believe my mom.

Being Content

There are a lot of things on my mind that I want to talk about. I hope that by releasing this energy elsewhere I can start 2023 with a slightly empty mind so I can focus on other things.

I was thinking about life and what truly makes me happy. I think this is going to be an ongoing thing. I am still learning things about myself every single day. My likes, dislikes and why I dislike something. What makes me laugh and gives me joy vs what makes me anxiety and afraid. 

I would like to blame hormones and I understand that my hormones does play a little part of why, but I know that I am in control. Like a boat, sailing in the open ocean I am in control of where I sail even when the waves or winds are against me. 

This past year has been a roller coaster for me (I'm sure it's worst for some). Not saying that a roller coaster is bad. I think riding one is better than a ride that twist you around the entire time. Or those that takes you up to heaven and suddenly drops you to hell. At least with a roller coaster, I know that when I am slowly going up, going down is next. It's like the calm before the storm. I don't necessary know when it is but I know it's coming. That feeling of knowing that something you're nervous about is near is the worst feeling. But at the end you always survive. Any ride, you will survive but it's the experience while going through that makes you who you are. A roller coaster is mostly fun I would say.

This year I am thankful especially for my in laws, my parents, my siblings especially my sisters, and my two daughters. The people I love are here with me and for that I couldn't ask for more. 

This year I've inhabit a bad habit of spending on Facebook. I've spent so much on pressed on nails. I promise that next year I'll try to have more self control. Actually, I'll have more self control starting today.

Also, I promise that I'll focus on more important things like my daughters, my little family, and myself. I think I give a good amount of myself to my girls but I know there is always room for more. I promise to be more patient, understanding, and supportive of my husband. I promise to be honest and true to myself. 

If I am given the chance to go to school, I will try my best to finish with good grades. Make my parents and my husband proud. Be able to support my little family so my husband can also chase his dream. I look forward to next year. I am content.